Monday, September 20, 2010

I'm Baaaaaaaaaack!!!!!!

Hello ladies!

First, let me apologize profusely for my very long absence from the world of blogging. I may not have been posting or commenting but I have been keeping up with many blogs and have desperately been wanting to begin communicating with all of my blogger friends again! I have been busy the last few months and there is one thing that has most been on my mind - dating. Since my last post (way back in December) I have been really making an effort to get out there and date. I never really dated much in high school or college, and I am now at the point where most of my close friends are married or in serious relationships. While I don't think I'm ready to get married anytime soon, I would love to meet someone special to spend time with - preferably someone who adores me. :) So, I have encountered several men during the last few months - two of which I am still currently "seeing". For those of you who don't know, "seeing" someone is slightly less serious than actually "dating" someone. That's my definition anyway. For the record, both of these relationships (and I use that term loosely) are the result of internet dating. So, currently there are two men - here are their stats.

Guy A
- 5'11 (only 1" taller than me - ugh)
- Slightly above average sense of humor
- Above average intelligence
- Works in marketing
- Good maker-outer ;)
- Been out on 4 dates, talk/text multiple times during the week
- Had a very long first date (5+ hours) and have since had several good dates - he is easy to talk to and I feel very comfortable around him.

Guy B
- 6'
- Amazing sense of humor - very dry
- Above average intelligence
- Works in business/marketing
- Have not performed the research to answer the making out question...
- Been out two times and text several times a week
- On both dates, we closed the restaurant down (i.e. last people there and they literally had to shut the music off to get us to leave) and laughed a lot.

So, here's the deal - it's safe to say that Guy A is smitten with me. On our second date, he told me he wasn't planning on going out with anyone else. Nice, but not the way I was feeling and maybe a little too much too soon. I think maybe you should wait 5-6 dates - maybe longer - to decide that, especially when you're online dating. What do you all think? Now, this guy is very sweet and I do like him, but I'm not bowled over with attraction for him. I get excited to see him and he's definitely growing on me but I definitely would not classify myself as smitten.

Now, Guy B is the real problem because.....I really like him. Now, is it because of his personality and charm or because he's been a bit more aloof than Guy A? Who knows? The bottom line is I like him. A lot. My trouble is that, now that I've established how much I like him, I cannot stop obsessing over whether or not he likes me. I google things like "male body language on dates" desperately hoping that since he turned his body to the right, that means he's madly in love with me and we're destined to get married and have 2-3 children. Now, part of this is (sadly) just my personality. Am I a freak? Do all women do this or is it just the 10% of us who suffer from a rare form of dating OCD? Let me also say that part of my constant fear of "does he like me?" stems from another horrible dating experience I had earlier this year. More about that in a later post....

I have solicited opinions from my Mom, my friends, and even my friends' boyfriends. Of course, now I am turning to you. A few questions.....

1. If you're doing online dating, at what point do you stop seeing other people and commit to one person? Please note: I am not ready to do this, just wondering...

2. Is it a bad thing not to kiss on the first two dates? This is the case with Guy B and it worries me. My friends don't think it's a bad thing but they love me too much to tell me the truth. :) Does it mean that a guy wants to take things slow and get to know me, or is he simply repulsed by me and the thought of kissing me could not be more repugnant to him? ;)

3. If a guy keeps texting you, does that mean he's at least somewhat interested, or is he just bored?

4. After the guy has initiated the first few dates, is it okay for the woman to suggest a date or should the man always make the first move?

5. When you first start dating a guy, how often do you expect/want him to contact you a week?

6. Am I a freak for thinking about this so much, or does everyone behave this way when you really like someone?

7. Exactly how many frogs does a girl have to kiss before she meets her prince? :)

Obviously ladies, your opinion is very much appreciated. I am going out with Guy A tomorrow night so I will keep you posted with any new developments! Sweet dreams!


Lindsay said...

Yay! Glad you're back! I am definitely obsessive like that over most things in my life! I tend to over analyze and in turn, miss out on the actual moment because I'm thinking about it too much! Just kick back and have a good time! Both guys sound great!

Preppy Pink Crocodile said...

Oh child, I am right there with you! Google is a double edge sword.

I never kiss on the first few dates so I don't think there is anything wrong with it at all. Not that kissing is wrong. But I wouldn't be paranoid about it. I think its such a sign of respect for a guy to refrain from making things physical right away.

Keep us posted! I can't wait to hear if you have any exciting date stories in the future!

The Niemeyer Nest said...

I missed you!!!!! YEAH for you! Somehow,I have missed this exciting news from our BFF's. Kissing is fun but some people do it too much and too soon in my opinion. Maybe this guy is just a real gentleman - hard to find those. Guys that make you laugh are the best!Keep us posted.

Katiellirb said...

Yay! Sooo glad to have you back! Sounds like Guy B is the one you're most interested. I'd say go for him and keep on looking online. No harm! :)

MCW said...

I was wondering where you were! After you were gone for so long I de-followed you and I shouldn't have!!!

My opinion to a few of your questions...

Kissing - If a guy goes in for the kiss on a first date that is a good sign. And it can also mean nothing at all. In the past I have found that the guys who like me always kiss me after 2 dates. But, one guy who was REALLY shy and scared to make the move.

A guy texting you means you are in his thoughts. But, he needs to pick up the phone and call. It becomes hard when you meet someone online. But, a guy who is not playing games will call.

Unless you are exclusive, he should always initiate the dates...they need to chase.

When I like a guy I want him to call me every single day. But, that never happens. And I freak out when I like the guy and never follow my own advice...

I have kissed over 150 frogs and I am getting tired of it. ha.

Hope things are going well! Glad you are back...

Dee Stephens said...

New here but I'm blog buds with MCW too.
Texting drives me nutz. I told hubby when i first met him no too text me but instead pick up the phone.