Monday, September 20, 2010
First, let me apologize profusely for my very long absence from the world of blogging. I may not have been posting or commenting but I have been keeping up with many blogs and have desperately been wanting to begin communicating with all of my blogger friends again! I have been busy the last few months and there is one thing that has most been on my mind - dating. Since my last post (way back in December) I have been really making an effort to get out there and date. I never really dated much in high school or college, and I am now at the point where most of my close friends are married or in serious relationships. While I don't think I'm ready to get married anytime soon, I would love to meet someone special to spend time with - preferably someone who adores me. :) So, I have encountered several men during the last few months - two of which I am still currently "seeing". For those of you who don't know, "seeing" someone is slightly less serious than actually "dating" someone. That's my definition anyway. For the record, both of these relationships (and I use that term loosely) are the result of internet dating. So, currently there are two men - here are their stats.
- 5'11 (only 1" taller than me - ugh)
- Slightly above average sense of humor
- Above average intelligence
- Works in marketing
- Good maker-outer ;)
- Been out on 4 dates, talk/text multiple times during the week
- Had a very long first date (5+ hours) and have since had several good dates - he is easy to talk to and I feel very comfortable around him.
- Amazing sense of humor - very dry
- Above average intelligence
- Works in business/marketing
- Have not performed the research to answer the making out question...
- Been out two times and text several times a week
- On both dates, we closed the restaurant down (i.e. last people there and they literally had to shut the music off to get us to leave) and laughed a lot.
So, here's the deal - it's safe to say that Guy A is smitten with me. On our second date, he told me he wasn't planning on going out with anyone else. Nice, but not the way I was feeling and maybe a little too much too soon. I think maybe you should wait 5-6 dates - maybe longer - to decide that, especially when you're online dating. What do you all think? Now, this guy is very sweet and I do like him, but I'm not bowled over with attraction for him. I get excited to see him and he's definitely growing on me but I definitely would not classify myself as smitten.
Now, Guy B is the real problem because.....I really like him. Now, is it because of his personality and charm or because he's been a bit more aloof than Guy A? Who knows? The bottom line is I like him. A lot. My trouble is that, now that I've established how much I like him, I cannot stop obsessing over whether or not he likes me. I google things like "male body language on dates" desperately hoping that since he turned his body to the right, that means he's madly in love with me and we're destined to get married and have 2-3 children. Now, part of this is (sadly) just my personality. Am I a freak? Do all women do this or is it just the 10% of us who suffer from a rare form of dating OCD? Let me also say that part of my constant fear of "does he like me?" stems from another horrible dating experience I had earlier this year. More about that in a later post....
I have solicited opinions from my Mom, my friends, and even my friends' boyfriends. Of course, now I am turning to you. A few questions.....
1. If you're doing online dating, at what point do you stop seeing other people and commit to one person? Please note: I am not ready to do this, just wondering...
2. Is it a bad thing not to kiss on the first two dates? This is the case with Guy B and it worries me. My friends don't think it's a bad thing but they love me too much to tell me the truth. :) Does it mean that a guy wants to take things slow and get to know me, or is he simply repulsed by me and the thought of kissing me could not be more repugnant to him? ;)
3. If a guy keeps texting you, does that mean he's at least somewhat interested, or is he just bored?
4. After the guy has initiated the first few dates, is it okay for the woman to suggest a date or should the man always make the first move?
5. When you first start dating a guy, how often do you expect/want him to contact you a week?
6. Am I a freak for thinking about this so much, or does everyone behave this way when you really like someone?
7. Exactly how many frogs does a girl have to kiss before she meets her prince? :)
Obviously ladies, your opinion is very much appreciated. I am going out with Guy A tomorrow night so I will keep you posted with any new developments! Sweet dreams!